Difficult times...

I am finding it increasingly difficult to go running.I am booked into a Half Marathon in July and the chances of me being able to run it are slim. What a huge shame.I just cannot make myself go out that often. After 8 months of running 4 times a week and dedicating myself totally to the cause of running the London Marathon I am now in a lull.

Part of me is appalled with myself for being so lazy and unmotivated and another part is just enjoying doing other things .... going shopping, reading, relaxing... People have told me that the marathon really takes it out of you and I can see that it does - emotionally as well as physically. I have run once this week, and I suppose I forgive myself that due to the hugely busy week it has been. My plan is to run tomorrow.

I plan to run with music and just spend some time enjoying myself... just running and rejoicing in the fact that I can run. I can run and I have run the London Marathon this year. I don't have to beat myself up about it. I am a bit of a perfectionist and I need to realise that I have no Paula Radcliffe type goals to meet. I am a 44 year old housewife and my running is something to be done as enjoyment, for my health and because I can.

The most important thing is to keep ticking over, keep being happy. If I push myself until running becomes a chore then I may well give up forever and that would be awful. I want to be still running when I am 70 !! I have a 10k to look forward to in September and that's a distance I really enjoy.

So, that's the plan. Wish me luck !!